1st Deployment...UGH!

I was a military brat and I totally understand (more from your daughter's perspectives) how hard a long term deployment is. It is challenging and really civilians cannot understand it, as they have no point of reference. It may be a good idea to look into anxiety medication as probably the preparation for your husband's departure will be harder than the actual deployment. With the deployment a new schedule will evolve for your family, now is the time, like you said, of bravery and smiles.

Feel free to message me anytime you need someone to talk to.

Hugs-
CK

I've been there hun. I was a military wife and went through my husband's first deployment when my son was 3 months old. and after only being married less than a year. (remember that saying about your first married year is your hardest? Imagine having a new baby, a deployment, and moving 1,000 miles away from every other single person you knew.) I did it, and I got through that-so I promise what you are going through....is normal. I would be more concerned if you didn't feel this way. Deployments are tough, no matter how many you go through. And you are correct, for those who haven't been there-there is no comparison or knowing what it is like. Deployments will test every type of strength you have, but they will make you stronger. I promise. If you need anything at all or want to talk or vent or whatever, let me know. Feel free to message me.
Is your husband reserves or are you near a base?

Thank you all for the supportive words. Mother2one - I could not imagine all of this occuring within the 1st year! My hat is off to you. My husband was Army National Guard but now active duty Army. We do not live on or near a base. Right now he is in a different state at a training facility.

I have never considered myself a "jealousy" person but he mentioned he started talking to an old friend (female) who he happened to dated before we met. It really bothered me because I know how clingy she is. She caused a strain in our relationship when we first got together. He hasn't had contact with her for 2 years. I know, I know, if he wanted to be with her he wouldn't have let 2 years go by. I know he wants to have connection....but why her? I did mention it to him but just let it drop. I didn't need to add any conflict this early into the process. We are both trying to start new schedules without each other together.

I know it has been difficult for him because he is not a person to just sit around and they have been doing alot of that. Plus they were at a nice base for a week and that base is amazing. Every comfort of home except family and friends. Then they are moved to the current facility that is very desolate. NOTHING around.

I took my youngest daughter out last night for some "mommy" time. We really had a great time. But in the back of my mind I am feeling guilty. He did tell me to keep busy and not to sit at home before he left. It is just so hard to continue on with the daily routine without him here.

I have never felt more lonely than when my husband was deployed. Every day seemed like a struggle. ALthough I tried to keep myself busy, coming home to an empty house was the worst. Hopefully being a part of this support group can help you remember that you are not the only lonely spouse out there....there are a lot of us. I really hope that you get through this long time apart, and grow stronger from the experience. Best of luck!

luvlee...your absolutely right! Coming home to an empty house is the worst! My girls go to their dads every other weekend and by Sunday I am depressed! I just take the dog for car rides to get out. Tonight I drove in the worst weather just to have dinner with friends...took me double the time to get home because of the weather...just to NOT be in the house. Thanks for the encouragement!